How do I Sign Up?
Simply click here and complete the checkout process. You’ll be a better person for doing so.
How much is it?
It’s 4 dollars a month, and even cheaper if you commit to more. If you notice it on your credit card statement, gurl you need a better job. That’s less than the price of a cocktail in any town that matters.
What Payment Options do I have?
You can pay using Visa, MasterCard, American Express, or Discover. We do not accept checks or money orders, this is the internet.
If you have chosen the month-to-month shade: You will be billed initially on the day you signed up with your credit card, and then the first of every month until you decide to cancel.
If you have chosen the 3 months, 6 months, or 1 year of shade: You will be charged the full amount upfront. After the segment of months, you will be charged again, until you'd like to cancel.
What kind of shade do you throw?
Imagine you’re on a deserted island, poor, hungry and broke. We’re on the boat that just happens to cruise by drinking martinis and judging your outfit.
How do you throw your shade?
We put it in the mail. Nothing really says “Your outfit was dated before you ever put it on” like a beautifully wax sealed envelope and card.
Where do you ship?
The United States of America. Land of the free, home of the shade.
At what time do you throw your shade?
Shade is thrown on the 25 of the month to arrive right around the 1st of the following month. Be patient, it’s worth it.
What if my shade never actually comes?
Did you give us the wrong address? You probably did. We’re professionals, and you’re not - this is almost always your fault. If for whatever reason we did screw up, we’ll put EXTRA shade in the mail for you. Can’t wait for the opportunity.
What's your Cancellation Policy?
Gurl, bye. Don’t let the door hit you where the good lord split you. You can cancel from within your account log in.
What's your Refund Policy?
hahahaha gurl, you serious? All shade is final! This ain’t target, we don’t care if you have a receipt. If it hits the mail, you’re paying for it.